The hidden cost of always raising the bar

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Welcome to The Leadership Edge, the space where ambitious professionals learn to step beyond performance and into impactful leadership.

Every leader I know holds high standards. It’s part of what got you here — the drive to deliver, the refusal to settle, the instinct to raise the bar. But there’s a fine line between driving excellence and demanding perfection. And when you cross it, your high standards stop inspiring people and start making them doubt themselves.

At first, it looks like strength. Deadlines are met, quality is consistent, things run smoothly. But under the surface, the signs are there: your team starts hesitating before sharing ideas, they double-check everything before coming to you, they avoid risks because they’ve learned it’s safer to meet expectations than to stretch them.

And soon, what once felt like excellence starts to feel like control.

When high standards turn into pressure

The intent behind high standards is always good. You want to protect quality, set an example, show what excellence looks like. You care deeply about getting it right for your clients, your stakeholders, your reputation.

But somewhere along the way, what started as a strength can start to create pressure instead of pride.

Your team begins to focus more on how not to get it wrong than on how to get it right. They avoid sharing half-formed ideas because they’re afraid they won’t measure up, they seek constant reassurance before making decisions, and you find yourself more and more in the role of final checker — the one who reviews, approves, corrects, perfects.

It’s not that your people can’t think for themselves. It’s that they’ve learned your approval matters more than their initiative.

The irony is that your standards were never the problem. It’s how those standards are perceived. And the data backs it up.

Harvard research shows that fear of getting it wrong cuts creative output by 45% whilst perfectionistic tendencies were linked to higher burnout and lower satisfaction across industries.

The cost of chasing perfect

One of my clients, an MD in financial services, came to me feeling frustrated. “My team is good,” she said, “but they never seem to go the extra mile. It’s like they’ve stopped thinking for themselves.”

When we unpacked it together, a pattern emerged. Her standards were sky-high: she reviewed every presentation, rewrote every proposal, and rarely let anything go out without her final approval. Her team had learned that nothing was ever quite good enough.

But she didn’t see it as control. To her, it was about protecting quality. She wanted the work to reflect well on the team, to show their capability. But to her people, it felt like scrutiny and lack of trust. They stopped taking initiative because they assumed she’d redo it anyway.

As we worked together, she began experimenting with what she called imperfect delegation. She handed over projects fully, resisting the urge to step in halfway. She replaced her detailed corrections with questions like, “What outcome are you aiming for?” or “How would you improve this next time?”

The change was immediate. Her team started bringing forward ideas she hadn’t expected. They took pride in their work rather than waiting for her approval and while not everything was flawless, more of it was bold, creative, and theirs.

What she discovered is that excellence doesn’t come from control — it comes from trust. And when she gave that trust, her team rose to meet it.

3 shifts to turn high standards into healthy performance

High standards don’t have to be the enemy of growth. The goal isn’t to lower the bar but to make sure it drives performance rather than creates pressure. These three shifts can help you create that balance:

  1. From flawless → to progress

    Perfectionism hides behind the pursuit of quality. But chasing flawless outcomes stops people from experimenting or taking risks. Instead of asking, “Is this perfect?”, try instead “Is this moving us forward?”

    Progress builds confidence. Perfection feeds paralysis.

  2. From correcting → to coaching

    When someone brings you work that isn’t quite there, resist the urge to fix it. Ask questions that guide them to think it through: “What’s your reasoning here?” or “If you had another day, what would you change?”

    You’ll develop their judgment and build far more capability than your red pen ever could.

  3. From performance → to learning

    High-performing teams don’t just hit targets; they learn faster than everyone else. Create space for reflection after success and after failure. Ask, “What did we learn here?” or “What would we do differently next time?” When the focus shifts from getting it right to getting better, growth becomes the new standard.

Excellence doesn’t come from how high you set the bar, but from creating the conditions where people can stretch, learn, and still feel safe reaching for it.

ICYMI

  • We promote on merit — or do we? Why fairness at work isn’t automatic, and what real meritocracy actually takes.

  • Doing more isn’t leadership. It’s time to stop carrying everything and start creating the conditions for others to thrive.

Leadership isn’t built overnight. It’s built in the choices you make every day.

Each week, The Leadership Edge brings you one step closer to leading with influence, presence, and impact. Keep leaning into the edge, that’s where growth happens.

See you in the next edition,

Tania Carvalho
Founder & Executive Coach

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